the responsibility of freedom

Listen, I’m just trying to not be crazy.

I have a nephew now.

I keep applying all of this sentimental bullshit to people that I don’t really know. I keep having dreams about Alejandro & then reading into them as if they really mean something. I don’t feel comfortable with the fact that I won’t know Hagay forever.

What is it that I need from these people? And why can’t I have it more easily?

He was born on April Fool’s Day, my nephew. It seems fitting, as it’s a big joke that my family finally has a baby boy but we are all doomed to never know him. (My sister has banished the rest of us from her life.)

My other sister is living a lie, and it’s ignorant and disrespectful for me to say that. When I told her to find some meaning in her life, I didn’t expect for her to go out searching for it in the ever-destitute film industry.

I’ve lost all hope in commitment.

THINGS TO BE AWARE OF
(as they seem to lead to a state of illusion and/or false sense of reality)
1. Passion - (i.e., extremes in any form)
2. Commitment - (just another extreme?)